Change can be really easy sometimes and you can turn on a dime. Other times, it can be like drudging through mud to make a change. So, I’d like to describe my Just One experiment. Humans are simple, yet complicated beings. We are humans on Planet Earth having extraordinary, ordinary, exhilarating, overwhelming human experiences. Human beings like to maintain homeostasis. We like our routines. We like our comfort zones. This is part of the reason why change can be hard. We tend to stick to what we know and what makes us feel comfortable. So, there are people who can change on a dime and people who can go cold turkey. They make a decision and boom, it’s changed. Great! For other people, this is not how change comes about.
As adults and human beings, we are constantly making decisions. What to have for breakfast? When do I fit in the exercise? How do I make the best of my time with family friends? For busy executives and entrepreneurs, there’s another layer of decision making. Do I surf the internet, or do I finish writing up that report, or your brief, or your notes? Do you force a smile or bite your tongue during a meeting or conference call when you just want to call someone out or fire someone?
All of these decisions take a mental toll and therefore, takeaway from your willpower and self-control. This is also called willpower depletion. Willpower and self-control, when overused or over-relied on, becomes nonexistent. This is what happens at the end of a day, or the end of the week when you’re most likely to reach for a drink or the cookie. This is exactly what physically happens to our muscles when they’re overused. We’re not machines or robots, so you can’t insert a new line of code and boom, we instantly have a new skill or new habit (though wouldn’t that be convenient).
How can we work around this, or how can we set reasonable and realistic expectations for ourselves when we want to change something, or make a lifestyle change?
I call this experiment the Just One Experiment. I call it an experiment because just think about how’d it be if we can kept our experimenter hats on, remained curious, and excited about what’s possible. Think about how it’d be and how it’d feel if we put on our Perfectionist hats and came from a place of all-or-nothing, or my way or the highway. Two different experiences.
If we played with Just One experiments, then we can make incremental changes and lift the pressure and pessimism from off of our shoulders. There’s already enough that we have to deal with, so we want to set ourselves up for success. We set ourselves up for failure, which is what happens when we have these unrealistic expectations that don’t align with reality, and when we don’t remain patient with ourselves because change takes time.
I help and support my clients to take baby steps. Many baby steps lead to a great leap.
Let’s talk about food and alcohol and exercise. Is there something that you’d like to change about your current eating and drinking habits? Is it too much sugar or salt? Too much junk? Not enough vegetables? Too much processed food? Have you been drinking more often lately? Is Happy Hour starting earlier and earlier?
Because I’m all for incremental changes, my Just One experiment for food and alcohol is reducing your intake by, you guessed it, just one. So, one less handful of chips, one less handful of M&M’s. Just one less bite. For alcohol, just one less drink. So, if you have a six-pack or a bottle of wine in a night, drink one less beer or one less glass. So, I’m not saying no candy, no potato chips, no beer, no wine. Just one less. Conversely, if you’re wanting to eat more vegetables, more fruit, more fill-in-the-blank, have just one bite.
Regarding exercise, are you wanting to incorporate more exercise into your schedule? Like the veggies and the fruit, go for just one. One pushup, one crunch, one squat, walking one block. Then, you’re done for that day. The next day, add or subtract one. Two bites of veggies, two bites of fruit, two pushups, walk two blocks. Drink two fewer beers, drink two glasses of wine.
I challenge you to take part in this Just One experiment if you want to try your hand at incremental change. Comment with what will you try to add or subtract one in your life.